Primary reasons why people hop the Sox bandwagon

What prompts someone to pull for the Boston Red Sox? Before delving into that question, let's clarify this: There is no such thing as a Red Sox fan that isn't a fan of all Boston sports. If you are supporting one entity, then you may as well support them all, because your face is already covered in dirt. So none of this, “Well I've always loved the Sox but the Cowboys are my NFL team.” No no no, please don't try and get classy and save face.
The “B” [for Bandwagoner] hats are selling like hot cakes these days. Is it because people once felt sorry for the Red Sox because of the curse? (No need for caps on “curse”, it doesn't warrant it). Is it because they feel the pain of Boston always being inferior to New York, whether it's the Yankees or the city itself being far more prestigious than anything Boston ever will? Maybe it's just a fad, and people tend to love fads. The point is, there is no acceptable answer.
That said, here is a closer look at some of those sad-sack excuses people come up with in regards to their undying support of the Red Sox:

The “curse”. Can't hear that one enough, can you? 86 years when they couldn't win a World Series. The ball through Bill Buckner's legs in the '86 series? Bucky “F***ing” Dent? Who knows? Who cares? There is a false sense of “lovable loser-ness” here that doesn't belong (much more suited to the Chicago Cubs). That always wins over some slimy hearts.
The underdog mentality garnered from being slapped around by the Yankees for years on end. Again, underdog is going overboard. Title or not, the Red Sox always had money to spend and seasons to remember. No one likes the Yankees; I can't stand them. But they are the standard of excellence in baseball, with 26 World Series titles to boast and countless daggers into the hearts of Boston fans (no complaints from me about the latter).
The fad. The hats are pretty basic. But then again, cigarettes are pretty nasty. And yet people smoke to look cool, or because it's a habit they can't kick. The Red Sox gain so much media attention thanks to their personal sports network, ESPN. Media attention is the primary reason for the grisly fad that doesn't figure to fade anytime soon.
“Red Sox Nation”. Another media creation. I don't pay much attention to Raider Nation, as entertaining as Black Hole in Oakland is. But any time a group of sports fans utilize this label, it diminishes their credibility greatly. Especially when the title was crowned by a television station, and not even the fans themselves.
Hatred of the Yankees. Might seem repetitive. I can't stand the Yankees, but I would stand behind them under an attack of whining Red Sox fans who are envious of the prestige and glamor of New York. The Giants are Super Bowl champions, and the Jets are on their way. The Mets and Rangers are always competitive. And New York, simply put, is the city that never sleeps. And for good reason. It is one of the best places to be in the world, with everything in every facet of life and culture to offer. Many hypocritical Bostonians end up moving there, like people from all over the globe. When it comes to sports, like it or not, New York is the cream of the crop. And the dislike for the Yankees (and this is what really gets my goat) automatically steers people to pull for the Red Sox, as if it's “If you're not cheering for one, it's the other.” This small-mindedness can again be largely attributed to the overdose the media provides of these two organizations.
You need to feel good about yourself. Sometimes sports act as an escape for us. We wrap ourselves up in our teams. If they win, we win. If they lose, we get down as if we lost. Like the countless Lakers and Cowboys supporters, it's always a safer bet to back a team that constantly wins. Therefore we (well, not me, speak for yourselves of course) are more likely to be satisfied. With that little psychoanalysis comes the striking reality that this is the poorest excuse yet. You really can't hold an intelligent sports conversation with someone like that because it is hard to really take them seriously as a sports fan.

Completing the monopoly: Bruins rising

Figures, doesn't it? Actually, not to me. I don't consider myself much of a gambler, so betting $1 on the Boston Bruins at 50/1 well before the hockey season started was a minimal investment with a nice potential return. I know very, very little about hockey, except that one thing was evident: The Bruins play in Boston, so they will get enough breaks to have a chance to win.
So far, I am looking pretty smart, for a change. All the Bruins have done is rack up 32 points, tops in the Eastern Conference and one shy of the San Jose Sharks' NHL-leading 35. I couldn't tell you much about the Bruins other then that their goaltending is considered among the game's elite. I believe they have a number of big-time fighters on their team, so foul play, as per usual with Boston sports, is likely a factor. I know that the Red Sox didn't win it in 2008, so A.J. Burnett is a likely candidate to end up there to make sure that doesn't happen again in 2009. For now, the Celtics are running away with a pitiful Eastern Conference in the NBA, and in case they slip, the Bruins likely will get enough luck on their side to more than make up for it.
Me, I am predictably disgusted, but hardly surprised. I don't really follow hockey enough to invest the same energy I do into baseball and football, but if a Boston team is winning, I'll take notice. If the Bruins do in fact rise to prominence and win the Stanley Cup, I will feel vindicated in one sense. There was little rhyme or reason why the Celtics became so dominant last season, and even less if the Bruins do the same this year. Except for the obvious theory that there is a higher being watching over Boston sports.
The $50 would be a nice “Sorry for your troubles” pocket cash if the Bruins complete the Boston sports monopoly, but it would continue a despicable trend of absurdity in the first decade of the 21st century. Canadian teams are supposed to rule hockey when the de facto powerhouse Red Wings slip, but Boston has the kind of charmed existence that automatically supersedes that. When the Bruins stand on the Fenway Park field before the Red Sox season opener in April hoisting the Stanley Cup trophy, it will put the cap on the complete takeover of sports. A scary thought indeed.

The 5 Most Enraging Moments Of Boston's Sports Decade

Throughout the enduring pain of Boston's sports gods smiling down on them this decade, there have been many moments that stand out for the frustration and anger they created. For every lucky break or inexplicable comeback they had, the sports world suffered just a little bit more. Take, for example, the infamous Tuck Rule. Now at the time, Boston sports had not gotten on their karmic run, so who knew then that the Notorious Raiders' misfortune would become the Patriots' everlasting treasure. Looking back on it, Oakland was cheated and the Patriots actually cheated. That unfortunate event, as well as Drew Bledsoe's untimely injury in Week 2 of that season, changed everything for the worse. A look back (and hopefully, not forward from this point on) at the 5 most grueling and despised moments in Boston's recent run in sports, in no particular order:

Game 5 of the 2007 ALCS. The end does not justify the means here. The Rays may have won the series in 7 games, but lest we forget that Game 5 may have emotionally and psychologically drained them for the World Series, in which they came out flat against an inferior but rested foe in Philadelphia. The 7-0 meltdown suffered by Tampa Bay was one of the most painful things I've ever watched. It figured Boston was back at their old cheap tricks, coming back from a deficit in a series to prove their place in baseball lore. The Rays (and the fans) had to gut out such a gruesome thought until Matt Garza finally turned out the lights on Boston's 2008 season in Game 7. But the days between Games 5 and 7 were terrifying, to say the least.


Game 4 of the 2008 NBA Finals. As if the Red Sox and Patriots' successes weren't enough, the Lakers got to experience what many past victims of those aforementioned clubs had in Game 4 of the NBA Finals last season. A complete and utter choke job only explainable by means of divine intervention ensued, as the Celtics erased a 24-point deficit to rally for a command 3-1 series lead. They went on to win in 6 games to make it a grisly trifecta in sports titles in the present decade. Perhaps the worst part about the Celtics' title run was that very few people saw it coming. Alas, that's how it always seems to be, doesn't it?

Super Bowl XXXVIII. So many little things that could've changed the game but didn't. Either it was the two failed, ill-advised two-point conversion attempts by Carolina, or it was their kicker, John Kasay, kicking the kickoff following the game-tying TD out of bounds, setting up a short field for Tom Brady to claim to be a hero by leading a truly-defining, 47-yard drive to set up a field goal. When Carolina took a short-lived, 22-21 lead in the fourth quarter, it was the first time we had the pleasure of even seeing the Patriots trail in a game in over two months to that point. The Panthers gave up a touchdown and never led again. Adam Vinatieri, who gets props at least for bolting to the rival Colts after the '05 season, got to experience deja vu and hammer the final nail in the Panthers' coffin.

Marlon McCree's fumbled interception, 2006 Divisional Playoffs. This is the one that killed me to almost no end. Even though it paved the way for Peyton Manning's heroics the following week in the championship game, the annual Patriots charade should never have gotten that far. Tom Brady was picked off for the third time in the game, but McCree carried the return like a loaf of bread, only to be stripped by prehistoric receiver Troy Brown. IT gave the announcers and media a chance to laud a “truly selfless” effort by the overrated Brown, when really the focus should have been on McCree's utter stupidity, as well as Marty Schottenheimer's constant postseason failures. Mercifully, Schottenheimer's career ended after this debacle, but the Patriots luck did not. Predictably, the botched interception set up the tying touchdown and ultimately the 24-21 victory, which the classless Patriots followed up by mocking the Chargers at midfield after the final seconds ticked off.

May 13, 2007. This was possibly the worst of them all because it involved my beloved Orioles being victimized by the Boston terrorism. The Orioles were well on the verge of taking two out of three at Fenway Park, leading 5-0 in the bottom of the 9th. Jeremy Guthrie had pitched lights-out to that point, and got the first out of the inning before catcher Ramon Hernandez mishandled an infield pop-up that ignited a brutal 6-run rally by the Red Sox. The horrendous nightmare culminated with Julio Lugo hitting a ground ball to the right side of the infield. Former Sox hero Kevin Millar made an errant flip to pitcher Chris Ray at first, allowing the winning runs to score. I immediately wen to the gym and took out my frustrations on the punching bag.

Manning's 2004 trumps Brady's 2007*

Again, notice the asterisk. Tom Brady may have thrown 50 touchdown passes to set a single-season record* in 2007. Peyton Manning held the legitimate previous mark at 49, breaking Dan Marino's mark that had stood for 20 years. But there are some facts worth noting that in this Patriots-hater's mind make Manning's record-breaking season a more impressive one.
Consider, first of all, that having the class that he does, Tony Dungy sat Manning in the fourth quarter of a number of blowouts to let backup Jim Sorgi take some reps. Bill Belichick, meanwhile, not only usually left Brady in, but once even brought him back out to throw one more scoring pass just to rub it in Miami's face because the winless Dolphins got to within 21 points.
Unlike when New England went for the jugular with nothing on the line other than a record in the final game against the Giants (who won the only matchup between the teams that mattered last season), Dungy pulled Manning after just one series of the Colts' season-finale in Denver. Sitting on 49 against a defense that just two weeks prior had been scorched for 45 points by a sub-.500 Chiefs team, Manning easily could've topped 50. Even with Marino's record gone, Manning should have figured it wouldn't be safe with cheaters still on the loose. But still, Dungy is a class act and wanted to make sure his top-notch players were healthy when the Colts met the Broncos again the next week in the first round of the playoffs.
Brady undoubtedly knew what plays the Jets were running in the 2007 opener, and it wouldn't be much of a shock if he caught some illegal video footage of some of the other opponents the Patriots played. There were games, like the aforementioned Miami contest and a game against Washington the following week in which, despite a massive lead, Brady was still in slinging it against a hapless, defeated foe. Brady connected with Wes Welker in the Washington game for a score to make it 45-0 in the fourth quarter. The pint-sized Welker, beneficiary of double- and triple-teams on Randy Moss all year, spiked the ball like he had just won the Super Bowl (something he will hopefully never experience). What did Marvin Harrison and Reggie Wayne do after a touchdown? Hand the ball to the official, even if the score put the Colts ahead in the fourth quarter.
All told, Brady maxed out with 50 scoring tosses. Manning probably lost more than a game's worth of action to rest because many of the Colts games that year were out of reach early. No need to rub it in, right? But had slimy Belichick been pulling the reigns, Manning's record would probably still be standing in the mid-50s.

More obnoxious fans: Patriots or Steelers?

Good Will Hunting, Jason Bourne and Entourage whole-heartedly support the New England Patriots, cheating, scumminess, and all. Of course, that's easy when it seems that 97% of the popular universe hails from the New England area. But the Steelers may smoke the Patriots in that department – literally. That's because they have the D-O-Double Jizzle in their corner, the one and only Snoop Dogg. Rumor has it that Billy Madison, Adam Sandler, is a Steelers supporter as well.

The Patriots are more of a “woodwork” team. That means that due to their recent success* (notice the asterisk), many of their so-called “fans” are still coming out of the woodwork (I actually met a guy who claimed to be a die-hard because he just ordered a Matt Cassel jersey over the Internet). The Steelers, admitted cheaters due to excessive steroid use during their reign of terror in the 70s, at least are more steeped in tradition that the team that was almost shipped off to Hartford by Robert Kraft prior to the turn of the 21st century.
These teams have met many a time in recent years, with much at stake every time. The Steelers are still trying to figure out what they are more steamed over, the cheap film the Patriots had of their sideline from the 2001 championship game or Deion Branch gloating to the all the Terrible Towel wavers after the 2004 title game. They played last year during the Patriots run at imperfection, when rookie safety Anthony Smith of the Steelers virtually guaranteed a win. The result, an inevitable 34-13 drubbing.
Pittsburgh is a blue collar, hard-nosed town. They haven't had much to cheer for in the last 15-20 years with their Pirates. The Penguins came up just short last year, while the Pitt football and basketball teams have been competitive if not glorious. But it's all about the Steelers. The terrible towels alone make them an easy target for fans of anyone else, especially their division rivals. The difference is, the Patriots should be despised by all. Especially their so-called “fans”.

Patriots' Welker only benefiting from Moss' presence

Maybe the most misleading stat in the history of football is that New England Patriots' receiver Wes Welker is the first player in NFL history to catch at least six passes in his team's first nine games of a season. Let's forget that he has a paltry 9.4 yards per catch, one touchdown, and his longest gain this year is 27 yards. Welker is among the most overrated receivers in football. All he does is run five-yard patterns out of the slot, which are usual open because defenses are so afraid of lackadaisical Randy Moss they usually assign two or three defenders to him.
Welker getting yardage is like taking any generic fast player and throwing him quick passes that any Average Joe could catch, and because the Patriots' lineman are generally holding and cut-blocking, he can pad his stats with so-called yards after the catch.
One friend of mine claims that although Welker and Moss may not be the most dynamic one-two punch in football, they complement each other better than anyone. I then compared that theory to an over-sized bully and his pint-sized sidekick. The sidekick can still command respect and get his licks in on the helpless victim because he is protected by his mammoth partner-in-crime.
Of course, no one even remembers that Welker was once a member of the Miami Dolphins. He did very little to command any respect of his own, which only furthers my claim that he is hardly anything special. But with Brady last year and Moss still around this year, Welker can reap all the benefits and claim he's the real deal.

Maybe Boston would prefer it this way -- without Brady

When Tom Brady went down for the season in Week 1, I was thrilled – not that he was injured, but simply that his Golden Boy aura finally experienced a little gray. I was ready to start focusing elsewhere, not wondering whether the Patriots would torment the league with their cheating the way they have this entire decade since that fateful day when Drew Bledsoe went down in 2001. But for Boston, the kings of charmed stories, it just seems to keep getting better for them. Matt Cassel, a nobody, leading a ball-control offense for a team now inexplicably in first place in the AFC East. With about a dozen running backs out, an undrafted free agent putting up 100-yard games. And a defense with a number of veterans gone still keeping teams under 20 points. No, the nightmare isn't over. It's just continuing.
New England may have had the best of both worlds after Tom Terrific tore up his knee. They could either have a down year and claim a freebie with Brady out, or have another playoff season and let smarmy Bill Belichick stick it to his critics that the sum is greater than the whole of its individual parts.
If the Jets can't avenge a disgraceful Week 2 loss in New England this coming Thursday, the ridiculous saga of Boston sports will continue with the Patriots at 7-3 and in first place in a crummy division who's deficiencies are masked by overachieving teams having winning records. Buffalo and Miami are not legitimate contenders, and the Jets are teetering on the brink. With everything that should have knocked the Patriots out like a wave of anesthesia, the legend and the lore keeps growing with every lucky win they get.
We can't say for sure if they still know the plays the opposition are running, although in today's contest against Buffalo it sure looked that way. Now it's up to the Jets, they of ratting out the Pats last year, to relieve the football fans of more Patriots-related suffering. Enough is enough.